Log in

11:18am 25/12/2004
mood: loved
Christmas InventoryCollapse )

(6 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

06:14am 22/12/2004
mood: tired

» I committed suicide:
» I said I liked you:
» I kissed you:
» I lived next door to you:
» I started smoking:
» I stole something:
» I was hospitalized:
» I ran away from home:
» I got into a fight and you weren't there:


» Personality:
» Eyes:
» Face:
» Hair:
» Clothes:
» Mannerisms:

[1] Who are you?
[2] Are we friends?
[3] When and how did we meet?
[4] How have I affected you?
[5] What do you think of me?
[6] What's the fondest memory you have of me?
[7] How long do you think we will be friends or enemies?
[8] Do you love me?
[9] Have I ever hurt you?
[10] Would you hug me?
[11] Would you kiss me?
[12] Would you fuck me?
[13] Are we close?
[14] Emotionally, what stands out?
[15] Do you wish I was cooler?
[16] On a scale of 1-10, how nice am I?
[17] Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
[18] Am I loveable?
[19] How long have you known me?
[20] Describe me in one word.
[21] What was your first impression?
[22] Do you still think that way about me now?
[23] What do you think my weakness is?
[24] Do you think I'll get married?
[25] What about me makes you happy?
[26] What about me makes you sad?
[27] What reminds you of me?
[28] What's something you would change about me?
[29] How well do you know me?
[30] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
[31] Do you think I would kill someone?
[32] Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?

(8 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

05:43pm 17/12/2004
mood: amused
A Very Nathy Christmas!Collapse )

(1 hopeful | show me beauty?)

Stolen from hamrchk82   
12:42pm 05/12/2004
  leave an anonymous comment with:

- 1 secret
- 1 critique
- 1 compliment
- 1 death threat
- 1 love note
- 1 word to describe yourself
- 1 word to describe me
- lyrics to a song
- how long we've known each other
- a hint to who you are

(6 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

05:21am 04/12/2004
mood: nervous
Ehehhhhhhhhhh. (<- That's a fake laugh I have to show I'm really nowhere near amused.)

I have the SAT today.

And I didn't do ANYTHING to prepare.

Oh, well. *shrugs, ignoring nervous butterflies in her stomach* If I do well, it'll be all the better because I didn't study, ne?

Oh, and to throw in the irony of a sophomore who's taking the SATs, I'm wearing my "I Love Nerds" shirt XD

(4 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

09:38pm 27/11/2004
mood: thoughtful

nathalsa:: i once knew this right proper cow, daisy her name was -- Danny says:
... My lord. This friend and I have inside jokes, have the same schedule except for one period, go to the same youth group, and have made out before. One would think someone's trying to send us a message/ o_o
Behind closed doors. (omg new New Order album February *cream*) says:
Behind closed doors. (omg new New Order album February *cream*) says:

... I feel rather freaked out now.

(3 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

09:25am 27/11/2004

79 people have me listed as a friend.

And yet I never get any comments.

(8 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

I Don't Know Why   
08:01am 27/11/2004
mood: thoughtful
I’ve known that You loved me.
How couldn’t I?
Stereotypical Christian home— on the surface.

Behind it was a barricade of words that
Shouldn’t have been said that were, and
Words that should have been said that weren’t.
A tumultuous, ever-shifting chaos of emotions.
Things and people I’ve known far too long
To make a difference.

I knew everything about You,
Except You Yourself.
I heard them all talk about
Fruit of the spirit,’
How the loss of it means You’re not there,
‘Spiritual discipline,’
How not having any means we don’t have you.
I knew I didn’t have it,
But I continued.

I’ve been searching for You blindly,
In a roundabout way.
A way involving being hurt and, eventually,
These hurts healing, but leaving reminders—
Like scars.
Like the scars I already possess.

Why do you want me?
Half of the time even I don’t want me.
So why would You, the maker of the world,
The salvation of its inhabitants,
Care about me?
Die for me?
Love me?

I don’t know why.
I have no answer as to why you want me
In Your Heaven.
But You do, and I answer the call.
For my heart belongs to You now, to do as you will.
To heal the scars, maybe,
Or perhaps to leave them as a reminder
Of life without You.
All I know is I am new.
And I am Yours— to do with as You will.
I don’t know why you love me,
But I have every reason to love You.

(2 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

Catching up...   
09:19am 26/11/2004
mood: happy
ambers, anni_the_diva, glori, hamrchk82, jgluva4eva, lovemyluggage, malulani, princesserin2, serendipitynsa, behazeled, laceypacey, laurelprincess, skatey

If you see your name on this list, please comment. I would love to talk to you all again. =)

(Psst-- plus I hope you all like the icon! You're the only ones who'll know where it's from! ;))

(12 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

11:59pm 25/11/2004
mood: happy
It's amazing how filled my life has become.

Then again, God is amazing. I don't know just what to say that can possibly sum it up. But I feel full of joy, full of Christ, full of love. All I want to do is burst into song right now. =) If Mum and Dad weren't still awake, I would.

I wanted to put up the Christmas tree for Dad tomorrow because it's a huge pain in the neck while they're out having fun in Black Friday (pfft, are they kidding? I'm not waking up for THAT). I know Dad hates setting it up so I thought I would for him. I guess not. =/ Ah, well.

Air1 is the best radio station. Everyone should listen to it.

(1 hopeful | show me beauty?)

01:00pm 24/11/2004
mood: happy
The dryness and dullness through which your patient is now going are not, as you fondly suppose, your workmanship; they are merely a natural phenomenon which will do us no good unless you make a good use of it.

To decide what the best use of it is, you must ask what use the Enemy wants to make of it, and then do the opposite, Now it may surprise you to learn that in His efforts to get permanent possession of asoul, He rekues on the troughs even more than the peaks; some of His special favourites have gone through longer and deeper troughs than anyone else. The reason is this. To us a human is primarily food; our aim is the absorption of its will into ours, the increase of our own area of selfhood at its expense. But the obedience which the Enemy demands of men is quite a different thing. One must face the fact that all the talk about His love for men, and His service being perfect freedom, is not (as one would gladly believe) mere propaganda, but an appalling truth. He really does want to fill the universe with a lot of loathsome little replicas of Himself-- creatures whose life, on its miniature scale, will be qualitatively like His own, not because He has absorbed them but because their wills freely conform to His. We want cattles who can finally become food; He wants servants who can finally become sons. We want to suck in, He wants to give out. We are empty and would be filled, He is full and flows over. Our war aim is a world in which Our Father Below has drawn all other beings into himself: the Enemy wants a world full of beings united to Him but still distinct.

And that is where the troughs come in. You must have often wondered why the Enemy does not make more use of His power to be sensibly present to human souls in any degree He chooses and at any moment. But now you see that the Irresistible and the Indisputable are the two weapons which the very nature of His scheme forbids him to use. Merely to override a human will (as His felt presence in any but the faintest and most mitigated degree would certainly do) would be for Him useless. He cannot ravish. He can only woo. For His ignoble idea is to eat the cake and have it; the creatures are to be one with him, but yet themselves; merely to cancel them, or assimilate them, will not serve. He is prepared to do a little overriding at the beginning. He will set them off with communications of His presence which, though faint, seem great to them, with emotional sweetness, and easy conquest over temptation. But He never allows this state of affairs to last long. Sooner or later He withdraws, if not in fact, at least from their conscious experience, all those supports and incentives. He leaves the creature to stand up on its own legs-- to carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish. It is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature He wants it to be. Hence the prayers offered in the state of dryness are those which please him best. We can drag our patients along by continual tempting, because we design them only for the table, and the more their will is interfered with the better. He cannot 'tempt' to virture as we do to vice. He wants them to learn to walk and therefore must take away His hand; and if only the will to walk is really their He is pleased even with their stumbles. Do not be deceived, Wormwood. Our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our Enemy's will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of Him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys.

--The Screwtape Letters, C.S. Lewis

(show me beauty?)

12:20pm 24/11/2004
  random pictures-- including from my first day backCollapse )  

(show me beauty?)

10:56am 24/11/2004
mood: happy
Redecorated LJ. Yay for prettiness! <333

(4 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

09:21pm 22/11/2004
mood: tired
survey thing stolen from RachealCollapse )

(show me beauty?)

Stolen from eary0h9j   
03:54pm 05/10/2004
mood: (in an obscure way)
Would you...
( ) go out with me?
( ) give me your number?
( ) have sex with me?
( ) let me kiss you?
( ) watch a movie with me...even a really sappy one?
( ) let me take you out to dinner?
( ) drive me somewhere/anywhere?
( ) take a shower with me?
( ) be my gf/bf?
( ) have a fling with me?
( ) listen to me if I called you crying even if you were out with all of your friends?
( ) buy me a drink if i didn't have money?
( ) take me home for the night?
( ) let me sleep in your bed?
( ) sing car karaoke w/ me?
( ) sit in the doctors office with me because I didn't want to go alone?
( ) re-post this for me to answer your questions?
( ) let me give you a piggyback ride?
( ) come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere?

(6 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

10:24pm 30/09/2004
  Feel free to buy me this. ;_;


(9 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

05:19pm 24/09/2004
mood: amused

  1. Think of a word you would use to describe me.
  2. Go to Google Image Search and search for that word.
  3. Select the picture you see as most fitting, and post it (or a link to it) as a reply, along with the word.

(4 hopefuls | show me beauty?)

10:52pm 23/09/2004
mood: sick
So. Chances are I just went to school. With bronchitis. B-e-a-ootiful. ~_~

I hope someone stupid like Mr. Skiff gets it from me! *_*

(1 hopeful | show me beauty?)

10:42pm 23/09/2004

</a></font></b></a>rhapsodica: http://isolaria.net/ I sooo wanna learn how to do that
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: merr
</a></font></b></a>rhapsodica: moo
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: you want to make a picture/
</a></font></b></a>rhapsodica: yesh
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: merr
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: bacon
</a></font></b></a>rhapsodica: pizza
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: phone
</a></font></b></a>rhapsodica: not now
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: ;_;
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: mupstair
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: woah
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: thats cool
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: i was upstairs and typed "i'm upstairs" on my wireless keyboard
</a></font></b></a>eary0h9j: and it sent... "mupstair"

i command everybody to add mupstair to their interest list! *_*


-- Ben


(show me beauty?)

07:23pm 21/09/2004
mood: ecstatic

(1 hopeful | show me beauty?)